Tuesday, June 19, 2007

Ao4, I need some camouflage tips!

I'm out from hiding while The Mom has gone to work. Let me tell you, I'm not that fond of this time of the year for the obvious reason - where the heck is the snow? - but there's something that the late spring, summer brings out that's even more hideous than the missing snow........

It's bath and grooming time!

The first bath of the season was about two weeks ago. The Mom lured me out of hiding with some tasty ham (Oh, Queen Meeshka, how does one perfect the mind over ham technique?), looped the bath collar on me and started lathering me up.

Then, it's nail clipping. Now, there's not a whole lot in this world that I absolutely hate, but getting my nails done - well, that's it. Once again, I was ambushed while napping! Next thing I knew, The Mom was on top of me, smothering me with her big ol' butt while she trimmed my nails. I got one or two really good claws in - including one that drew blood - but each and every nail was trimmed.

After that, it's the fur between my sensitive little toes. Now, I won't go in to too many unlady like details, but I have to have a bit of fur trimmed off my tootsies every now and then to keep from getting painful mats. But, as I said and as The Mom knows, those little toes are sensitive. That doesn't stop her from getting out the scissors and trimming away though.

Finally, when I have practically no dignity left, out comes the rake. No I don't want to be brushed. And it's not even a brush, it's a funky looking thing with teeth that digs in to my fur and takes it away. I'll be naked before long. One saving grace here - so far, it's only my left side that's been subjected to the torture. The right side is mine, and I'm protecting it at all costs!!!

Ao4, do you have any camouflage tips for your loyal trooper? How can I hide from the grooming, while coming out for the good stuff - food, water, belly rubs?

Oh! I hear the front door!

Dakota signing off.


PiratesGrrl said...

Oh Dakota, that sounds positively dreadful. Did you get any kind of compensation for all that torture?!?

The Brat Pack

Dakota said...

Thrawn and the pack,

Nope, not one bit of compensation! Right now, we're even OUT OF PUPPY BISCUITS!!!!

The Army of Four said...

Brushes and combs and all things grooming-related are EVIL! I try hiding under the dining room table or behind the chair in the living room, but Mom always knows how to FIND ME! Hmph!
I'm blowing coat again, big time. Every time I walk past Mom, she tries to pluck me. It's AWFUL!